I had no idea....

So....I don't know about you. But I had no idea cancer looked like cloudy pink sponges. I found myself staring at this picture for a long time. The healthy tissue looks like Freddy Kruegers face. I wish I had a better understanding of medicine. I distinctly remember in kindergarden when they passed out our math books, opening it up and then pushing it aside so I could play pretend and doodle. It was all down hill from there.

Why can't they just go in and take out the pick fluffy stuff. They do it on Grey's Anatomy all the time in 40 min. This is why I hate cancer SO MUCH. It's complicated and sneaky and just a plain old bitch.

This is the same tumor after surgery. They could not get it all but the pink puffy cloud has definitely gone down in mass. I still hate it.

The lack of control I have over this situation is maddening. The cancer has spread, it's even in his ankles. I had no idea you could have cancer in your ankles. What is one supposed to do now? Well, the plan is to hang out with my Dad, hug him, hold his hand, make him laugh, and go bowling after Thanksgiving dinner.

That's as far ahead as I want to go now. I love my Dad so much.

My Dad and I drove across the country together a few years ago. We learned so much about each other on that trip, my dad uses the phrase "hard meats and hard cheeses", hilarious. He learned how I took my coffee, he watched me dance in Walt Disney World parades, he met my best friend in the world, I learned that he does like music!!! (This is odd because ALL of my life he never wanted music on in the car) Turns out he LOVES "King of the Road" by Roger Miller. We listened to it 100's of times on the trip. He also likes Frank Sinatra and the Rat Pack. That made the trip wonderful.

On that road trip...All I wanted to do was get home. Right now I could think of nothing better than hoping in that old Chevy Cavalier and hitting the road with my Daddio.

F you cancer.

I love you so much Dad.